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real talk: planning a wedding with family drama

Life, Lifestyle · June 24, 2014 · 23 Comments

You know those topics that people usually try to avoid in blogland, because it’s typically not coated in glitter with a peony on the side?

Yes. We’re going there today.

The reality is that there are some snafus of wedding planning that no one really talks about or warns you about–one of them is family drama.

Well, I’m here today to blow the roof off this joint. Let’s dish family issues.
It seems like weddings and funerals are when families like to lose their proverbial shit for no good reason other than to hear their own voices, am I right?

EVERYONE HAS AN OPINION.

Anyone who knows me personally knows that I’ve never had a particularly good relationship with my biological father for a laundry-list of reasons. Something about cheating on my mom and lying on a continual basis just doesn’t sit well with me. Weird, right? In any case, I’ve never let that come between the relationship I shared with his extended family, because the issues I have are with him.

When it came time to do wedding invitations, I was cautious about inviting him, but was determined to be the bigger person and sent one along anyhow–probably against my better judgement. He got the same invitation everyone got–the one about no children being invited.

Now this is where the everyone has an opinion portion of the show comes along. Other members of his family have taken it upon themselves to call and text me, tell me I’m in the wrong for not including their children and that I should really reconsider my relationship with him.

What in the..what?!!

I’m supposed to reconcile a broken relationship, change the precedence Dane and I have already set AND configure OUR day…TO THEM?!

I have one thing to say about that…

And Honestly? I think it’s for the better. The less drama I have on our wedding day, the better, and if I’m being frank, drama follows crazy people. Forever and Ever Amen.

The lesson here? “No good deed goes unpunished.” has never been a truer saying.

When you’re planning a wedding–don’t try to be the bigger person. Small-minded individuals will always be small-minded. Don’t try to appease people. Some people can never be truly happy. Don’t do something just to make a statement and for the love of God, leave the crazies off your lists.

Do…make the day entirely what you want.
Do…invite the people who can fully support you and love you unconditionally.
Do…not worry about what other people are going to think. See Exhibit A: Everyone Has An Opinion.

Whew! Now that I can breathe again–what wedding snafus did you run into while planning?

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Kait Hanson, author of Communikait, a travel blog & Hawaiian lifestyle blog
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I'm Kait, the creative behind Communikait, a travel blog & Hawaiian lifestyle blog packed with loads of color and designed to inspire you to live your very best life. Whether you've come for recipes, travel ideas, photos of Hawaii or to simply say hello - I'm glad you're here!

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